Family Traditions

"Make the honoring of family traditions—holiday traditions, birthday traditions, Sunday traditions, dinnertime traditions—and the development of new ones a priority throughout your lives. Honor them, write them down, and make certain you follow them. ... Be certain you are creating a rich environment in which your family can look forward to special times of the year when traditions hold you together as a great eternal family unit.  

Understand that this is neither a simple nor an easy solution. Just as Rome was not built in a day, neither are family traditions. Family traditions can offer basic and lasting support, but there’s a lot that must be built around them. Perhaps family traditions work only when they create a role for every member of the family and when there is united effort to build them. This means family members need to spend time together and learn how to work together. When it comes to families, there is no such thing as quality time without a certain quantity of time."                     L. Tom Perry

As with most families, gathering for holidays and birthdays was a must. These photos from Christmas 1955 show a large family get together at Florence & Caryl Holton's, in London, Ohio. The London Holtons had many holiday and birthday dinners together over the decades. This Christmas we were joined by Mary's parents, Mildred & Harry Floyd (from Evanston, Illinois) and Dick, Connie, Melissa & Jane Holton. I'm not sure where they were living in 1955. 

*************

In the top picture - note the style of the telephone. The curved table in front of the couch is still in the family. I think that's Susan kneeling in the middle. I think she's wearing a felt poodle skirt.  Gram (Mildred Floyd) made the skirts for Susan and Julia that Christmas. 

Everyone is admiring the Christmas mobile made by Caryl Holton. One of Grandpa's traditions was to make a mobile and hang it over the dining room table at Christmas. On the table - olives. We always had olives at special dinners. 

************

If we could have a redo, we would be more deliberate about developing more family traditions. 

Learning & Doing God's Will

"We can arise each day with a determination to learn what God would have us do — and then do His will. When our efforts are aligned with the Father's will, we will always do that which is best."*

Our lives are filled with much to do and doing is good. Our challenge is usually determining the "best" thing to do. Good, better, best - of all our choices, what's the best choice? 

"Some uses of individual and family time are better, and others are best. We have to forego some good things in order to choose others that are better or best because they develop faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and strengthen our families." Read more in Dallin Oaks' talk "Good, Better, Best." 

*"Go Forward In Faith"

Mormon Tabernacle Choir Fans

The Mormon Tabernacle Choir now has its own YouTube channel. "It currently has almost 90 videos and approximately 500 minutes of footage, and new material, including full episodes of its renowned program 'Music and the Spoken Word,' past Christmas specials and concerts featuring special guests, is uploaded on a weekly basis."  Read more here. 

Check out this Christmas special with Walter Cronkite. 

 www.youtube.com/MormonTabChoir

*********

The Mormon Tabernacle Choir will be in Columbus, Ohio June 12, 2013. The performance is 7:30 at Nationwide Arena. According to the choir's website, tickets are available through Ticketmaster. 

Book - Empty-Nest Parenting

One of the hardest things about parenting is that we too often gain knowledge and wisdom AFTER the children pass the phase when we needed the knowledge and wisdom.

“Empty-Nest Parenting” deals with issues we wish we’d thought about more when our family was younger – and talked about with our children. 

I’ve long admired Richard and Linda Eyre for their insights on family – and their skillful writing and speaking about the importance of family. They raised 9 children and wrote “Empty-Nest Parenting” when their children started leaving home. They were committed to keeping their family close even as their children started their adult lives.

How do you build a strong family culture than continues to grow and strengthen when children start families of their own? 

The Eyres deal with empty nest issues such as finances, evolving relationships and changing roles - hanging on and letting go. I liked the book as a reminder of issues that are good to think about and discuss before and during children's transition away from their childhood home. The Eyres involved their children in the discussions that led to this book. Parts of it may seem a bit much, almost micromanaging. The format was sometimes a bit confusing. How the Eyres dealt with specific situations, like all parental advice, won't work for everyone. 

Three generation families (and four if you're fortunate) are a wonderful combination of the past, present, and future. Deliberate parenting results in blessings for all generations. 

*********

Empty-Nest Parenting by Richard & Linda Eyre, Bookcraft, 2002

The book is no longer in print but is available through used book sellers. 

You can also get a free pdf of the book from the Eyres here 

          (some formatting issues when I looked at it)

Read more here

Looking Forward

"While the Christmas season is typically a time for looking back and celebrating the birth of our Lord, it seems to me that it should also be a time of looking to the future. Let us look forward. Let us prepare for that blessed day when He will come again. 

Let us be as wise as those ancients who watched for His coming. As His disciples, let us have in our hearts and minds the words of John: “Even so, come, Lord Jesus" (Revelation 22:20)"

Dieter F. Uchtdorf


Good Tidings of Great Joy

O Come, Emmanuel

Faith

"Faith in God cannot of course be other than personal.  It must be yours, it must be mine; and, to be effective, must spring from the mind and heart.  

Every man will do well to pray with Emerson: 'O God, make me willing to be willing to do thy will.'  

The responsibility, therefore, of making the world better belongs to you, and to you, and to a million others professing his name"  

(David O. McKay, Gospel Ideals, p. 11)  

Christmas Ship

Since 1949 the Argosy Christmas Ship festival has been bringing together Puget Sound communities to celebrate this special time of year. Portions of ticket sales benefit local charities. "From November 24th through December 23rd, 2012 the Argosy Christmas Ship™ sails to different Puget Sound waterfront communities, over 45 in total. Choirs onboard sing 20-minute performances to these communities, all broadcast via state-of-the-art speaker system. On shore, thousands of people gather around roaring bonfires anticipating the arrival of the Christmas Ship™. You can either join us on board the Christmas Ship™ or one of the Parade ships that follow, or join with friends and neighbors to gather together for your own caroling tradition. If you own your own boat, feel welcome to add lights to your vessel and join in the festival and help form the largest holiday floating parade in the world!" Argosy 

We joined this festive fun Saturday night and had a wonderful time. Our son and his family joined us. There's something magical about lights and music on the water at night. 

Joe leads the way to our ship - the one on the left. We were on the Parade Ship. The carolers rode on the Christmas ship on the right. Speakers made it possible for us to hear the concerts at Kirkland's Marina Park and Seattle's Madison Park. People gathered around bonfires at the parks to listen to the concert and watch the brightly lit ships. 

Both the Christmas Ship and Parade Ship were wonderfully decorated. There were crafts for the children and games. Santa managed to be on both ships. 

The Christmas ship leaves Kirkland

Christmas trees on top, a star, big "peace" sign on the back of the Christmas ship

Boats of all sizes followed the Christmas ship and Parade ship. It was chilly and windy on the lake. 

Madison Park, Seattle

Christmas ship in the distance

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Things & Stories

At this point in our lives, many of our "things" have stories attached. This picture was taken on Christmas Day 1981 at our house on North Street. Not only is it a nice picture of Mom and Dad but it also is full of things with stories.

The wood is from a tree that we cut down in our backyard. The wood box came from Grandpa and Grandma's on First Street. It was in their basement. Originally built to hold paint cans, it had Chinese men and some sort of product words printed on the side. I don't know if I ever took a picture of the side of the box.

One year Dad made bellows for each of the four children. He carved our initials in the wood.

The vase on the mantel was a gift from Ray and Betty Pepper and is one of a pair.

Mary Holton made beautiful pine cone garlands for the four children one Christmas. They are still in good condition. 

The coal bin on the right came from the Atherton estate. Joe's aunt was a nurse for a Kentucky distiller and married him in his old age. Joe's mother ended up inheriting many pieces of furniture and items from his estate. Oh the stories connected with all that!!!

One more story - the wood around the fireplace is painted what we called Williamsburg blue. We went through a "Williamsburg period." 

Testimony & Conversion

“A testimony comes when the Holy Ghost gives the earnest seeker a witness of the truth. A moving testimony vitalizes faith; that is, it induces repentance and obedience to the commandments. Conversion, on the other hand, is the fruit of or the reward for, repentance and obedience.  Conversion is effected by divine forgiveness which remits sins. Thus the earnest seeker is converted to a newness of life. His spirit is healed.”                                               Marion G. Romney

“Whereas a testimony is spiritual knowledge of truth obtained through the power of the Holy Ghost, conversion is deepening devotion to and consistent application of the knowledge we have received.  Knowing that the gospel is true is the essence of testimony. Consistently being true to the gospel we know is the essence of conversion. … We  should both know the gospel is true and constantly be true to the gospel.”  David Bednar (Act in Doctrine, p 83)  

The Big City

Seattle is just across Lake Washington from us. We can be in downtown Seattle in about 20 minutes (nonrush hour traffic). Joe's vocal cord surgeon is at the Virginia Mason Hospital in downtown Seattle so we get to the big city every once in a while for his checkups. On our most recent trip we received the good news that Joe's vocal cords are clear. That means we got through 2012 with no surgery and no cancer. For this we are EXTREMELY grateful. Here's what we did while we were in the big city. 

Kerry Park has magnificent views - even on a cloudy day

We explored part of the Queen Anne neighborhood 

- many interesting houses

We went to the Mount Pleasant Cemetery to find the graves of Edgar and Ella Hall Ames. While surfing the Internet one evening, I discovered they were buried here. I have yet to find out how they ended up in Seattle. Edgar is the brother of Urania Ames Holton, mother of Caryl Holton. So Edgar is Grandpa's uncle. Edgar was born probably in Illinois, then when he was very young he and his mother Urania Howell Ames, traveled to California to be with husband/father Alson Ames who was there searching for gold. Edgar's sister Urania Ames was born in California in the 1850s. They then went back to Illinois. Edgar was in Minnesota as an adult. Why did he come to Seattle?

From an earlier email exchange I had with the cemetery, I had the lot and section number of Edgar and Ella's burials. When we visited in person, the office worker at the cemetery told me there were no markers on the graves so I wouldn't be able to find their burial spaces. She had no use for genealogists and others who take photos of tombstones and post them online. She wouldn't tell me who else was buried in the lot (clue for relatives). It was a very interesting conversation (or nonconversation depending on how you look at it). I can't remember the last time I ran into someone so uncooperative when I was doing genealogy. She must have had some very bad experiences. 

Edgar and Ella might be in this general area if I read the map correctly. 

After our cemetery experience we drove north a ways to find the SAS shoe store. It's the only one in the Seattle area. Joe's feet do very well in SAS shoes. We located the store but discovered it was closed for the week - according to a handwritten sign on the door - "sorry for the inconvenience." It would have been nice if they'd posted that information on their website. In trying to figure out how to get out of where we were, we came across the "Northgate" area which is home to a huge mall we've heard people talk about. So - we now know where Northgate is. 

A GPS certainly makes this kind of exploring a bit easier than relying solely on paper maps. Only problem is that our GPS gets very confused in downtown Seattle - always has. We don't know if it's due to the streets and bridges that are sometimes layered on top of each other. We know from sad experience that "Alice" will give us contradictory directions and sometimes just quit functioning - not even trying to "recalculate." Maybe it's time for a new GPS although our maps are supposedly up to date. 

It was getting to be midafternoon. We hadn't yet had lunch because we wanted to eat at the 5 Spot restaurant in the Queen Anne neighborhood. The first time we drove past the restaurant we couldn't find a parking space. After our Northgate excursion we decided to drive back into central Seattle and see if we could find parking close to the 5 Spot. We lucked out this time and enjoyed a late lunch. This restaurant is interesting in that the menu and decor are changed periodically to reflect a theme. They were celebrating the Carolinas on this visit. When we were here last year with the Kings, Philadelphia was the theme. The food has been very good both times we've eaten there. 

Good-bye to the big city

Why the Owl?

Bill Holton's journey on this earth ended today, December 19, 2003. My father is greatly missed. We are thankful for him and the legacy he left behind.

This explanation of his use of the owl came from "The End Times," the notebook he left to help us when he passed to the other side. 

 ******************************

Why the Owl?

When I participated in the Wood Badge Training Course, I was placed in the Owl Patrol. In an attempt to inculcate patrol spirit into the men in the course, the instructors placed a great deal of emphasis on the use of patrol totems -- emblems of particular significance to each particular patrol. They also had each person develop his own totem, and insisted that our log books and correspondence be signed not only with a name but also a totem.

Some time later, I found that the Holton Family coat of arms features an owl on top of the shield. Quite a coincidence.

And it was natural that we call the printing business the Owl Press, as most of the work is done at night.

Besides that, it's a neat device. 

December 1981

October 2003

Christmas Story

The Birth

The Resurrected Christ

*************************

The Nativity set was painted by Daniel, Lauren, and Madison King for Christmas 2006.

The Nativity set is on a plate that shows the loaves and fishes mosaic found at the Church of the Loaves and the Fishes in Tabgha, Israel. The plate was a gift from Mary and Bill Holton. See a picture of it here. 

*************************

The Christmas story - birth, miracles, resurrection - and so much more!

It's Beginning To Look Like Christmas

This little boy and his "Fine Feathered Friends" are ready for Christmas. 

Kirkland's Christmas tree

Joe walks past Hector's in downtown Kirkland. 

We had a delicious dinner at Hector's. 

Snapdragons and other flowers were still blooming in flower boxes outside Hector's

 - in the middle of December!

Marina Park - downtown Kirkland

These boats are all decked out for Christmas. 

Heather's Poems

Heather was one of "my" young women in the youth group at church. I was their teacher and advisor. In truth, they taught me much more than I taught them. When Heather was 15 she learned she had a rare and deadly form of cancer. She fought it valiantly for six years and then could fight it no more. 

Heather taught me to crochet. I wasn't a quick student. When we moved to Kirkland, I brought the unfinished piece she was helping me with. I never finished it but yet I keep it - a reminder of teacher and student and how those roles can switch back and forth.

Heather was very aware that her time here on earth would be short. She talked about it, mostly in a matter of fact way as I remember our conversations. Heather wanted to be remembered and she wanted her family to have something from her after she died. She crocheted beautiful afghans for many family members. After Heather's death, Heather's mother gave me a booklet of Heather's poems written during her six year fight with cancer. The other day I went through it and was touched by Heather's wisdom and insights. I've added some comments that came to me as I reread these poems.

********************

Humidity

I feel like a flower,

wilting-

in the heat.

My color is fading;

a tiny brown leaf-

Oh, to be tundra moss

with permafrost underneath my feet.

I'd gladly set down roots for awhile.

Cold would be a welcoming treat.

jht - Did Heather capture the feeling of a hot, humid Ohio summer day?

Night Beauty

Moonlight

streaming on my hair

falling from the skies

like rain,

silver fair.

The drops are 

clinging to me

bringing me hope

and laughter, 

flying free.

Heart of mine

be still.

eyes look up and weep,

mouth open and teeth parted wide,

of moonshine I drink my fill. 

jht - I can picture Heather in her backyard with her face lifted towards the moonlight.

My Friend

Your friendship means so much to me.

You hold my hands through the smiles and tears.

You've helped me make my hard decisions,

and kept me calm through my worst fears.

I don't know how to thank you.

I'm not sure I could find a way.

Just know that I always will love you,

until, and after, my dying day.

jht - Heather was a wonderful friend. Friends can remain friends, "until, and after, my dying day."