Geraldine Brooks

So many things to love about our community. Recently I was able to go to the nearby performance center to enjoy listening to a great author - and it was free!

Geraldine Brooks is the author of five novels, the Pulitzer Prize–winning March, Caleb’s Crossing, People of the Book, Year of Wonders, and The Secret Chord. I've read all but this last one. 

People of the Book is one of those books I read every few years. See my post about People of the Book here and Caleb's Crossing here.

Born and raised in Australia, Brooks came to Columbia University on a scholarship to the journalism master’s program. She mentioned to a fellow student that when she was younger she had a penpal from Menemsha on Martha’s Vineyard and that she’d always wanted to go there. The man mentioned he lived on Martha’s Vineyard and invited her to come with him that weekend and he’d take her to the town. She accepted. She went to Martha’s Vineyard and later married that man, Tony Horwitz.

She and her husband traveled the world for 12 years as foreign correspondents for the Wall Street Journal. Eventually they settled down on Martha’s Vineyard to raise their family. While living there, she became acquainted with the story of Caleb (Cheeshahteaumauck), a Wampanoag, who was the first Native American to graduate from Harvard, in 1665. 

What are the chances of a girl from Australia to get a pen pal from Martha’s Vineyard? Then to move to the States and have a classmate who lives on Martha’s Vineyard. Marry that man and live on Martha’s Vineyard where she learns about Caleb. She must have been destined to tell his story.

Some notes I made from her presentation in Kirkland - 

Talking about subjects for her books - find implausible truths. Write about "shards of history." She said she tries to hear "the unheard voices." 

Brooks said the key to art is to keep doing it. She doesn't believe in "writer's block." As a journalist she had to produce stories according to deadlines. There could be no writer's block. Brooks said writing is much like a description a friend gave of producing art - "Mess, mess, mess, art!" You have to get started and make the "messes" before you can have "art."

Geraldine Brooks' website
NPR interview with Brooks 
More about Cheeshahteaumauck here, here, and here  

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A totally unrelated tidbit discovered while finding links for this post - At one point one in four children was born on Martha's Vineyard! More here 

What's It Like?

Friends and family frequently ask "How are you doing?" Sometimes a person says, "How are you REALLY doing?" indicating a desire to know more than "OK, We're hanging in. It's been a good week. It's been a rough week." 

Shalissa Lindsay suggests asking instead, "What's it like ...?" 

"The questions “How are you doing” or, “how are you REALLY doing?” implied that Anne [has multiple sclerosis] might be in a needy, struggling place ... [and we know the person likely is; that's why we're asking] So how can you allow them to open up without prying?"

"The question “What’s it like [to have MS]?” empowered Anne to share her hard-won expertise on a difficult subject. Because the inquiry focused on the external environment, instead of Anne’s individual coping, it felt more supportive and less judgmental. It also conveyed intellectual humility, desire to learn, and the assumption that the listening friend would benefit and be enriched by Anne’s perspective.

Consider how rephrasing these commonly asked questions makes them easier to answer:

How are you doing on the job search?

What’s it like to search for a job these days?

How are you doing in your new school?

What’s it like to be the new kid? What’s your new school like?

How are you getting along with your new family?
What’s it like to adjust to a blended family?

How are you doing? Recovering well?

What’s it like to recover from this type of surgery?

–what it’s like to place a parent in hospice?

–what’s it like to parent with peanut allergies?

–what’s it like to have family in the military?

–what’s it like to go through Christmas for the first time without your spouse?"

I've been thinking about how Joe and I would answer "What's it like...?"

"How are you doing?" Joe usually answers "Fantastic!" That doesn't enable him to share his experiences with Parkinson's. 

"How are you doing?" Depending on the day, I might say, "I'm really tired or it's been a tough week  or we're hanging in there - but Joe's maintaining his wonderful attitude." Where would that conversation go compared to "What's it like to have caregivers in your home?" What's it like to have a spouse with Parkinson's?"

I'm going to ponder this and see if it feels right, loving, and supportive to ask a question this way. 

Read the whole post here. 

image from pixabay.com

Happy Mistake

Back in the old, old days, before digital photography - In April 1985 I was in California for a conference. I took a picture of daisies at the Los Angeles Temple. Then I took the film out of the camera to use a different kind of film. When I put the first film back in the camera I was in San Louis Obispo visiting a friend who used to live in Worthington. When the film was processed, I discovered this double image. I'd forgotten to advance the film when I put it back in the camera. 

I liked the effect so much that I spent weeks, and lots of film, trying to recreate another "mistake" like this. I was never able to get one that looked as good as this one. 

Growing Into Expectations

Often we have grand plans and expectations for ourselves and our families. Implementing those plans and living up to those expectations involves a lot of work over a long period of time.

I like Shawni Eyre Pothier's thoughts on "growing into my expectations." She relates her experience switching to a new camera.

 "I immediately started shooting with confidence. You see, in my mind, there was no effort involved on my part in making the camera switch. I was quite confident that the new technology would magically shift me over into the realm of out-of-this-world photography.

To my surprise, the first pictures I downloaded weren't anything fancy. My second batch wasn't so hot either...nor was my thirteenth. ...  I gradually realized that I was going to have to really work with this thing. But of course, since I love photography so much I was willing to put in the hours it took to get on the right path. ...

But again, for the love of my hobby I'm up for the challenge. I learn new things all the time and build on the base I have. The learning curve doesn't go away. There is always something new to reach for and it's ok that it's hard and overwhelming at times, because I love it.

Then she relates a situation with her children - a time when she had some pretty high expectations for a family road trip. It didn't quite work out the way she envisioned it. 

"... in reality the best things in life come after working hard on them. Not that we haven't worked our little hearts out with [our family] ..., but just like I'm always figuring out new photography tidbits along the way, even more so as a mother I have to continually strive to re-evaluate how we are doing things. I have to have my mind open to new tactics along the way."

Sometimes I have to remind myself of my favorite saying my wise mother says: "Life is Long."

Some day we will take road trips again as a family.

Some day down the road, if I work at it and take baby steps I will probably be standing in some art museum with all my children ooooo'ing and ahhhhhhh'ing about the majesty of how artists portray what they do.

Some day I'm sure a lot of my grand expectations will come to fruition.

Some of them I will most probably realize weren't really the right expectations in the first place.

It may take years or decades to reach the worthy-to-reach-for ones. And the majority of them most certainly won't come without work.

But if I continually, prayerfully re-make and realign how I deal with things as a mother, they will come.

And the reward will be that much sweeter.

Read blog post here

Ray Pepper's Birthday

Ray Pepper

Joe's friend, hero and father (step)

June 19, 1915 - September 20, 1996

 Ray Pepper graduated from Perry Township High School, Shelby County, Ohio. 

This paperweight must have been given out at the class reunion in 1990

ca 1956 - Ray, Betty (Maude, Mary Elizabeth) & Joe

Happy Father's Day

ca 1954

Dad gave of himself in many ways - he even gave us his red hair!

Beauties

A friend brought these beautiful peonies from her garden. They reminded me of Mom and her peonies. I've written about Mom and peonies a number of times. Here and here are just two of the posts.

peony buds make me think of potential for beauty

I think this is a Japanese dogwood. Just this small section is tinted pink. 

Notice how the petals are tucked in at the top instead of swirled into a tight bud. 

All the roses on this bush were like this. 

These low growing rose bushes are used in street median strips. 

They bloom Spring, Summer and Fall.

Around Town

Back here I wrote about the flowers put on this table and wondered if it was in memory of the person named on the plaque, Mac Graham. I looked online and found an obituary for Mac Graham. He grew up in Kirkland and died at age 21. This lakeside table is a beautiful spot to sit and remember a loved one. Most mornings I go to the lake I see flowers on this table. The flowers are changed often. More here and here

Heads up! A week or so before this picture I saw a crane at this site with a load of four or five honey buckets chained together. The operator lifted them to the top of this construction site. This day they were lowering the buckets; two were in this load. I wondered how careful the crane operator had to be not to jiggle the containers so the contents wouldn't slosh out. 

I often get myself warmed up for the day on these very steep stairs. Some mornings my body really resists climbing them. I loop around the block so I can walk the stairs multiple times. Often when my body is saying we can't do this again, I'll push on - just one more time. 

This tiny plant is growing half way up the stairs. It inspires me. Despite all the concrete and caulking, it found a way to sprout and grow. Persistence! 

Centennial Fountain at Marina Park frames Seattle across the lake

Power

Recently my monitor was acting funny. It was on, working fine, and then it would go black. I had to press keys to get it to come back on. 

I'm normally pretty calm, and approach problems fairly methodically. But every once in a while something happens and I don't slip into my usual calm problem-solving self. This was one of those days. My mind started racing a mile a minute - one more thing to take care of. I don't have the time or the energy to deal with this. I started searching on the Internet for potential problems with this monitor. I'm going to have to make ANOTHER trip to the store to exchange this, .... 

You know how this line of thinking goes - ever spiraling upward into more anxiety and woe is me. I was really working myself up. 

Thankfully before I got too far along on this anxiety road, I looked down and noticed the computer's power cord had somehow come unplugged. The computer couldn't power the monitor in battery mode. I plugged it in and was good to go - feeling a bit chagrined that I hadn't checked this first. 

I need to slip into problem solving mode quickly - all the time. 

I could also come up with some other thoughts about making sure we're plugged into the source of power and light. I'll save that for another post at a later time. You'll probably see these pictures again.

One Patch, One Story At A Time

“Since we cannot reclaim the past out of whole cloth, we must take it one patch at a time.”    Timothy G. Merrill

These blog posts are patches that together give you an idea of our lives and what's going on in our hearts and minds. 

image from Pixabay

Vortex to Cathedral Dome

"The world I live in is loud and blurring and toilets plug ... and I forget everything and these six kids lean hard into me all day to teach and raise and lead and I fail hard and there are real souls that are at stake and how long do I really have to figure out how to live full of grace, full of joy - before these six beautiful children fly the coop and my mothering days fold up quiet?

"How do you open the eyes to see how to take the daily domestic, workday vortex and invert it into the dome of an everyday cathedral?" (Ann Voskamp quoted by blogger Catherine Arveseth).  

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Obviously we're at a different point in life than Voskamp, but our situation is similar. We have our own kind of "daily domestic, workday vortex" that too often extends throughout the night.  Like Voskamp, some days I wonder how long I have to get this right, to live full of joy and grace in the midst of this daily vortex.  

Joe frequently says, "We are a team." That we are. Together we are figuring out how to deal with the challenges of this part of our lives.

We know what comes next & that's what makes 

it possible to keep going through this steep part of our journey.

Wednesday Market

We have an abundance of outdoor markets during the summer. On Wednesdays there's a market at Marina Park, just a few blocks from us. 

See the man playing the violin? He plays a variety of instruments all over town. 

 The park, right on the lake, is a beautiful setting for the market

Food trucks, crafts, lots of fruits & vegetables

beautiful flowers

Peonies

This peony display at a nearby grocery brought back memories.

Mom loved her peony bushes. They were planted on the south side of the driveway. Before bringing the cut flowers inside she would put them in a pail of water on the back porch for a while. The hope was that all the huge black ants that occupied the peonies would move out of the flowers before they were brought inside. 

June 2009 - blooms from Mom's peony plants 

that Jan moved to her garden after Mom's death

December 1982

Morning Encounter

Morning Encounter

Sometimes we don't have to move very far to change our perspective. 

We decide what's going to be the center of our focus.